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Do African Americans in Phoenix Need a Leadership Group?

Who does the mainstream media run to every time a news story involves or has an impact on African Americans?

• The Don Imus-Rutgers Women's Basketball team fiasco ... Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson
• Jena 6 ... Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson
• Hip Hop Summit ... Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson
• Hurricane Katrina ... Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson

It doesn't matter where the news event occurs in the United States, it always seems that news reporters run to Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson for quotes!

Now, I'm not sayin' that I don't respect Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson for their decades-long efforts to galvanize African Americans and to educate all people about our plight in this country. I truly respect these men and I see them as national leaders.

However, I wonder if African Americans in Phoenix, Arizona would feel comfortable in having Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson represent us if a local news story involving our people captures the entire nation's interest.

I've lived in Arizona all of my life and can only recall Jesse Jackson visiting Phoenix once. I don't know how many times Al Sharpton has been here.

What's my point?

Here are the questions ...

• Would black people in Arizona prefer to have leadership that has roots here (homes, businesses, family, etc.)?
• Does our community already have African American leaders that we can look to for guidance on our history, racism, health, education, poverty, ways to achieve economic independence, ways to reduce crime, ways to unify our people?
• If so, who are they? If not, do we need a leadership team?

Maybe I'm babbling, but this is something I've been pondering for years. It's very clear that our community in Phoenix is fractured and has been for many years. However, I constantly run into African Americans who want to see more unity among our people.

I'm well aware of the fact that we have African American legislators and organizations such as the Greater Phoenix Urban League and Greater Phoenix Black Chamber of Commerce.

I'd like to see these African American government officials, businesspeople, religious leaders and community activists work together on a mission to become the main resources for our community.

I've heard about the African American Strategic Leadership Group (AASLG) headed by Councilman Michael Johnson, District 8, which was formed in 2006 to address this need.

However, I don't feel that this group has been effective in accomplishing this mission. If you asked an average person on the street if he or she has even heard of the AASLG, I bet nine out of 10 would say "No." 

I think the AASLG has made a valiant effort and I applaud this group for wanting to educate and empower the African American community of Arizona. But what has this organization actually accomplished? I receive the AASLG e-mails on a regular basis about the group's "discussions," but when is this group going to develop and implement a plan into our community?

I partially blame myself for not getting more involved with this group in the past, but this post has rejuvenated my desire to make the AASLG better in the future!

If you have a response to this post, please COMMENT today! Every opinion or question is valuable! Let's make Phoenix a better place for African Americans right now!

Online Dating: Love Is Just a Click Away!

In the past, I've written about "How Black Women Can Woo Black Men in Phoenix" and the "Top 5 Places to Find Black Professional Men in Phoenix."

Those blog entries have been extremely popular, but I'm about to blow the doors off the hinges when comes to meeting potential love interests in the Phoenix area!

Do you wanna know the quickest and easiest way for black people to find mates in the Valley of the Sun? Maaaan, this is so simple and I can't believe I haven't mentioned this in the past!

I see you sittin' on the edge of your chairs! Many of you have probably experimented with this method of finding dates in Phoenix.

So, what am I talking about?

ONLINE DATING!!

Somebody please make me understand why Online Dating seems to be such a dirty, little secret in America?

Recently, my fiancee and I went out to dinner with a couple who met on the Internet. They've been together for quite some time and when we asked them how they met ... they tried to stall us and fumbled over their words for a few minutes!

"Errrr uhh, see uhhhh, what had happened was, ooooh uhhh have you tried the baked beans yet? ..."

It was clear that they were embarrassed about having to admit the truth.

However, they finally 'fessed up and my fiancee and I thought it was cool! Their story was romantic, it's obvious that they're truly happy with each other and that's all that mattered to us! We were really mad about the fact that they took so damn long to tell their story!

C'mon y'all, it's the 21st century! The Internet is probably the main tool that connects us all!

We are well aware of the many reasons why businesses and individuals utilize the Information Superhighway, so why do people think it's so taboo to use the World Wide Web to find love?

I remember meeting a few women back in the day online. BlackPlanet.com was my second home in 2001! I had a few good dates and a few bad ones. Usually the bad dates happened with the women who didn't put their photos on their pages.

Oh I remember their excuses for not puttin' any pics on their profiles ...

"Oh I swear I look good, I just don't put my pic on my page cuz I need to protect my privacy!"

"Oh uhhh, I want a man to value me for my mind, not my face!"

Like a sucka, I took the bait and when I actually met them in person, they looked like Rerun from "What's Happenin' Now!"

Bottom line, Online Dating is the most practical way to meet people, especially in a metropolis that is as spread out as the Valley of the Sun!

With Online Dating, you can select which person is perfect for you based on looks, age, physique, profession, smoking habits, drinking habits, religion and the number of kids they have! The fun part is ... you never actually have to meet the person! You can make your choices from the comforts of your own home (or office)!

If you don't like what you see, you can quickly click on the next profile or visit a new dating Website instead of having to waste two or three hours on a boring, blind date! Don't get me started on the blind dates! I already told y'all about one of my nightmarish stories!

There are millions of people who use the Web to find their soulmates!

To those people who haven't given online dating a try, I have one thing to say ... "Get With the Times!"

Phoenix Black Wives Network Building a Community for Married Couples

There's a Black network in Phoenix and its focus is unique in that it celebrates the Black marriage while also creating friendship and connectivity among black women.

The Phoenix Black Wives Network is an elite "sistahgirl" organization about friendship, fellowship and fun! The group plans to meet twice monthly -- once for a sistahgirl connection and once for a couples nite out. The celebration of the Black marriage is something that we desperately need in Phoenix.

I encourage all black wives in the Phoenix area to take the time to learn more about this group. For more information, please visit www.blackwivesnetwork.com.

I am eternally grateful to my mother, the great Mama PhxSoul, for getting our family involved with a group similar to the Phoenix Black Wives Network when I was growing up here in Phoenix in the 1970s and 80s. We were active in Jack & Jill, an organization that celebrated the Black family. I truly enjoyed those years because back in those days, you could go for weeks without seeing another black person in the Valley! Jack & Jill afforded with me with wonderful opportunities to socialize with other black kids and I'm happy to say that I'm still friends with many of the people I met back then.

It would be great to see if the Phoenix Black Wives Network can eventually be a catalyst for a more connected community (similar to Jack & Jill) right here in Phoenix.

If you'd like to see your community organization listed on PhxSoul.com, please add your information to our Online Business Directory.

Make A Fresh Start on Your First Date with Fresh Breath!

I was at a party recently talking to one of my boys and he was suffering from some serious halitosis! His breath was soooo bad, I asked him if he had eaten a dead body before he came to the party!

I handed him a whole pack of gum to remedy the situation, but that funny incident reminded of some that happened to me about five or six years ago. I hope you enjoy this story ...

My so-called friend set me up on a blind date. He described her as a 28-year-old, gorgeous, professional, educated, independent black woman with no kids who was fine as hell!

I thought to myself, "Wow! She sounds like a great catch! She might be the next Mrs. PhxSoul! I wonder why a brotha hasn't locked her down already!"

A few days later, I picked her up at her apartment and oh my lord, she was better than I imagined! She had a beautiful smile, she was polite, well-dressed and her body almost made me pass out! Fellas, you know what I'm talkin' about - one of those bodies that make you look around for another brotha just so you both could say, "DAAAAAAMN!" 

It was cold that night so we rushed to my car. After she put on her seatbelt, she turned me and shouted, "I've got a great idea! I love sports so let's go to the Phoenix Coyotes game tonight!"

I thought to myself, "My boy hooked me up! A woman who loves sports? Oh man, I must be dreamin'! I was gonna take her to a romantic spot like LoLo's Chicken and Waffles, but a hockey game would be ten times better!"

She was almost giddy as I sped off to the game! She said, "Ohhhhhhh, I love me some hhhhhockey!"

And right at that moment, I smelled something so foul that it made me sit up straight in my driver's seat like somebody poked me in the butt with a needle! Tears welled up in my eyes. What was that smell? Did my cologne go bad on me? Did I forget to use deodorant? Did I step in some doggie doo-doo on the way to car?

She smiled and added, "Hhhhhockey is great because of all the hhhhard-hhhhhhitting action!"

And then I realized what the smell was ... homegirl's breath was kickin' field goals!

And she kept using words that started with a H! Every H word that oozed out of her mouth was like a death blow to my nostrils! 

• "Hhhhhhey, will you buy me a hhhhhhot dog at the game?"
• "The dating scene in Phoenix is hhhhhorrible!"
• "My favorite vacation spot is Hhhhhawaii! Hhhhhave you been to Hhhhhhawaii?"

I thought I was gonna throw up in my mouth! I rolled down my window to get some fresh air but my date yelled, "Hhhhhey, it's coooooold!"

I offered her some gum and she had the nerve to say, "Nooooo, I'm aiiiiight. You tryin' say somethin?" Then she laughed before I had a chance to answer!

Is it me or do all people with funky breath refuse to take the hint when you offer them a mint?

So we got to the game and her breath got worse! I thought the "hhhhhot dog" would help mask her breath but no such luck.

She was talkin' up a storm during the game and I think the fans near us caught a whiff of her breath because they kept looking at me like they were seasick! I couldn't understand how a girl so beautiful had so much rottenness inside of her!

Finally, one of the fans pulled me into the aisle and said, "Hey dude, I'm sorry, but you gotta do something about your girlfriend's breath! She's totally killin' all of us! My wife fainted three times and it's only the first period! Help us out bro!"

I told him to be patient because I had a plan to end the madness. All of the fans around me were staring at me with this look on their faces like, PLEASE SAVE US!! I knew I had to do something drastic!

I sat next to her and when my date started to speak, I jumped up, grabbed her jaw and shoved ten pieces of gum in her mouth while screamin', "Ahhhhhhh! I can't take it no more woman! Yo breath smells like $#!+! Chew woman chew!"

And then things went black ...

I woke up two weeks later in the hospital with three doctors standing over me.

I asked them, "What happened? How did I get here?"

The doctors replied, "Don't worry Mr. PhxSoul, we were finally able to dislodge the hockey stick that your date crammed down your throat, but we still need to keep you here a few more days so we can remove the rest of the hockey pucks from your body. Boy, you must've had one bad blind date!"

The moral of this story ... bad breath can kill ya!

Happy datin' y'all!